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On the heals of divorce fillings, Shellie Zimmerman made a call to 911, accusing her estranged husband, George Zimmerman, of threatening her with a gun and punching her father in the nose. She later changed her story and decided not to press charges. Prosecutors could still press charges based on the videos from the home, and the squad cars that responded to the call. You can read more about the 911 call in the Associated Press article dated September 9. Click here for the full article.

Chances are we have not heard the last of the Zimmerman family. END WNStoryRelatedBoxAccording to an Associated Press articles on September 5, “George Zimmerman’s wife filed for divorce Thursday, less than two months after her husband was acquitted of murdering Trayvon Martin and a week after she pleaded guilty to perjury in his case. Shellie Zimmerman made the decision because of “disappointment,” her attorney, Kelly Sims, wrote Thursday in a short email to The Associated Press.

The 26-year-old Zimmerman told ABC’s “Good Morning America” last week that she was having serious doubts about remaining married. The interview came just after she pleaded guilty to a misdemeanor perjury charge for lying during a bail hearing following her husband’s arrest for the fatal shooting of 17-year-old Trayvon Martin in February 2012. Her husband, who was acquitted on second-degree murder and other charges in July, wasn’t in the Sanford, Fla., courtroom as she was sentenced to a year’s probation and 100 hours of community service – even though she supported him and lied about their finances.” Click here for the full article. If you are interesed in reading about George Zimmerman’s recent encounters with the police over speeding, click here.

You remember your wedding day with fondness and cherished memories. You started out together with such similar life goals and dreams. You had no idea that you could actually grow apart over time. When you said your vows to stay married through sickness and health, through wealth and poverty, to be together forever until separated by death, you meant them with all your heart. You have become discouraged and disillusioned by the fact that you have problems, that often seem too big to ever work out. You are not alone – everyone who has ever been married knows that issues will constantly need to be worked through. As each issue resurfaces every so often, you are forced to make a choice: to accept this person for who they are or to criticize them until they become who you want them to be. Realistically, trying to change someone is an impossible job. And who wants to be married to someone who is pretending to be someone they are not, in order to be accepted and fully loved? That’s not true love and acceptance at all. It’s probably easy to recall many wonderful times you have had together, but they are often overshadowed by the strain of all that has burdened your marriage for many months and even years. You don’t know how to fix all that’s broken in your marriage, and wonder if divorce is the answer. When you think of getting a divorce, the feelings are mixed. You desire relief from the ongoing disagreements, cutting remarks, and emotional exhaustion. On the other hand, you deeply love and care for this person you promised to love and cherish forever, and wonder if there’s another option? While we provide legal services for anyone looking for a divorce, we also hope that if there’s any way to save your marriage, that you would consider taking those steps first. Divorce has a ripple effect – those who get divorce often have no idea the effect their choice has on close relatives and friends, especially children, whether young or all grown up.

Assessing Your Marriage and Motives

But before we go on, let’s first deal with the issue of safety. If you are being physically, emotionally, sexually abused and/or your children are suffering under any kind of abuse from your spouse, you must get out immediately and seek professional help. There may still be ways to save your marriage and save your family, but not if anyone’s safety is compromised. If safety is not your number one concern in your marriage, then we’d like to suggest a few helpful questions to ask yourself before making the final decision to get a divorce.

1. What Has Your Level of Commitment Been In The Marriage? If you have not put forth every effort to work on your marriage, to partner with your spouse in every aspect of your relationship, to work through and face the difficult issues, and to honestly look at your own role in perpetuating certain dysfunction in your marriage, then you must face the fact that your low level of commitment has contributed to your desire to walk away from the marriage.
2. Are You Threatening Divorce To Get Your Way? There are countless situations in marriage where one or both spouses resorts to manipulation in order to get their way on any particular disagreement they may be having. Threatening divorce is cruel and hurtful to the marriage relationship. It says, “Give me my way or watch me walk away.” This is not a true love relationship with give and take on both sides. This is a relationship based on whoever gets their way – no matter the cost – wins.
3. Have You Considered the Effect Your Divorce Will Have? People are so quick to get a divorce and move on, that they forget or don’t even realize the effect that such an action has on those around them, those who are most closely connected to you as a couple, especially children. Have you considered what divorce will do to their world? They have no control, no say over your decision, and yet, they are expected to comply with shared custody, moving back and forth several times a month so that you and your spouse can be apart. Have you also considered the financial effects of divorce? It is a decision that could affect your financial security for years to come.
4. Do You Both Want A Divorce? Sometimes, it is just one spouse who wants a divorce while the other spouse is either clueless about the level of dissatisfaction in the marriage or truly wants to work on the marriage. If one person wants a divorce without any desire for reconciliation, then it leaves the other spouse in a very difficult spot, without many options but to move forward with the divorce.
5. What Made You Love Your Spouse In The First Place? After you get married and get into a rhythm of life with careers, children, family, hobbies, and other activities, it is easy (and quite common) to find you have grown apart. You realize that the intimacy just isn’t there. But you can ask yourself when the intimacy stopped and remember all that you loved about your spouse in the first place. Another common difficulty is not knowing how to reconnect after your children have left the nest. This is a wonderful time to rediscover the love you had for each other by participating in similar activities and spending time talking through some of the struggles you’ve been facing.
6. Have You Seen A Counselor or Mediator? If you or your spouse are on the fence, why not agree to talk with a counselor or mediator to try to bridge the gap on issues that require immediate attention.

Suggestions for Improving Your Marriage

There are probably hundreds of different ways you can rekindle the romance you once experienced and enjoyed with your spouse, but here are a few ways that we think your marriage would benefit.

1. Purpose To Spend Time Together. It is common for couples to be married and yet, to lead very separate lives. Become interested in activities and hobbies that your spouse is interested in, take walks together, eat your meals together, plan a day trip to another city and plan it according to what you know will please your spouse.
2. Plan A Weekend Getaway. There are wonderful places to get away together, but you might also looking specifically for organizations that host marriage retreats, where the focus is to rekindle the spark in your marriage.
3. Start Reaching Out to Your Spouse With A Love Journal. Write your feelings and questions in a journal, and let your spouse respond at his/her convenience.
4. Listen. When two people have been married for so long, they often complete each other’s thoughts and sentences. But look at and listen to your spouse as though you were dating again. Find out who they are today. Don’t be a know-it-all.

We wanted to share some alternative ideas to getting a divorce, but we realize that not all situations are so cut and dry. If you are still interested in contacting us for a free consultation, we would be more than happy to talk with you about the best way to proceed from here.

The day you got married, you said your vows wholeheartedly. You knew this was the person you wanted to spend the rest of your life with. You knew marriage would be difficult at times, but you had no idea it would ever come to the point where you would want out.

It’s probably easy to recall many wonderful times you have had together, but they are often overshadowed by the strain of all that has burdened your marriage for many months and even years. You don’t know how to fix all that’s broken in your marriage, and wonder if divorce is the answer. When you think of getting a divorce, the feelings are mixed. You desire relief from the ongoing disagreements, cutting remarks, and emotional exhaustion. On the other hand, you deeply love and care for this person you promised to love and cherish forever, and wonder if there’s another option?

While we provide legal services for anyone looking for a divorce, we also hope that if there’s any way to save your marriage, that you would consider taking those steps first. Divorce has a ripple effect – those who get divorce often have no idea the effect their choice has on close relatives and friends, especially children, whether young or all grown up.

But before we go on, let’s first deal with the issue of safety. If you are being physically, emotionally, sexually abused and/or your children are suffering under any kind of abuse from your spouse, you must get out immediately and seek professional help. There may still be ways to save your marriage and save your family, but not if anyone’s safety is compromised.

If safety is not your number one concern in your marriage, then we’d like to suggest a few helpful questions to ask yourself before making the final decision to get a divorce.

1. What Has Your Level of Commitment Been In The Marriage? If you have not put forth every effort to work on your marriage, to partner with your spouse in every aspect of your relationship, to work through and face the difficult issues, and to honestly look at your own role in perpetuating certain dysfunction in your marriage, then you must face the fact that your low level of commitment has contributed to your desire to walk away from the marriage.
2. Are You Threatening Divorce To Get Your Way? There are countless situations in marriage where one or both spouses resorts to manipulation in order to get their way on any particular disagreement they may be having. Threatening divorce is cruel and hurtful to the marriage relationship. It says, “Give me my way or watch me walk away.” This is not a true love relationship with give and take on both sides. This is a relationship based on whoever gets their way – no matter the cost – wins.
3. Have You Considered the Effect Your Divorce Will Have? People are so quick to get a divorce and move on, that they forget or don’t even realize the effect that such an action has on those around them, those who are most closely connected to you as a couple, especially children. Have you considered what divorce will do to their world? They have no control, no say over your decision, and yet, they are expected to comply with shared custody, moving back and forth several times a month so that you and your spouse can be apart. Have you also considered the financial effects of divorce? It is a decision that could affect your financial security for years to come.
4. Do You Both Want A Divorce? Sometimes, it is just one spouse who wants a divorce while the other spouse is either clueless about the level of dissatisfaction in the marriage or truly wants to work on the marriage. If one person wants a divorce without any desire for reconciliation, then it leaves the other spouse in a very difficult spot, without many options but to move forward with the divorce.
5. What Made You Love Your Spouse In The First Place? After you get married and get into a rhythm of life with careers, children, family, hobbies, and other activities, it is easy (and quite common) to find you have grown apart. You realize that the intimacy just isn’t there. But you can ask yourself when the intimacy stopped and remember all that you loved about your spouse in the first place. Another common difficulty is not knowing how to reconnect after your children have left the nest. This is a wonderful time to rediscover the love you had for each other by participating in similar activities and spending time talking through some of the struggles you’ve been facing.
6. Have You Seen A Counselor or Mediator? If you or your spouse are on the fence, why not agree to talk with a counselor or mediator to try to bridge the gap on issues that require immediate attention.

There are probably hundreds of different ways you can rekindle the romance you once experienced and enjoyed with your spouse, but here are a few ways that we think your marriage would benefit.

1. Purpose To Spend Time Together. It is common for couples to be married and yet, to lead very separate lives. Become interested in activities and hobbies that your spouse is interested in, take walks together, eat your meals together, plan a day trip to another city and plan it according to what you know will please your spouse.
2. Plan A Weekend Getaway. There are wonderful places to get away together, but you might also looking specifically for organizations that host marriage retreats, where the focus is to rekindle the spark in your marriage.
3. Start Reaching Out to Your Spouse With A Love Journal. Write your feelings and questions in a journal, and let your spouse respond at his/her convenience.
4. Listen. When two people have been married for so long, they often complete each other’s thoughts and sentences. But look at and listen to your spouse as though you were dating again. Find out who they are today. Don’t be a know-it-all.

We wanted to share some alternative ideas to getting a divorce, but we realize that not all situations are so cut and dry. Contact a Bergen County divorce lawyer for a free consultation, we would be more than happy to talk with you about the best way to proceed from here.

Our Hackensack divorce attorneys can help you if you believe your child support amount is unfair for any reason, if your ex has hired an attorney, if you have a business or other assets to protect, or if your ex is avoiding paying child support. Child support issues are not always simple. They are one of the most common causes of dispute in a divorce.Before you come to your first visit with an attorney, its helpful to have the latest information about your child support case . You can find your child support information on the state website: http://www.njchildsupport.org/# You can also call the New Jersey Child Support Information Line at 1-877-NJKIDS1, or visit your local office. The Bergen County Child Support office is located at 133 River Street, Hackensack, New Jersey, 07601 , and can be reached by phone at (201) 527-1200.The highly qualified Bergen County lawyers at Aretsky & Aretsky provide experienced, caring, and aggressive representation in the areas of Divorce, Criminal Defense, Employment Law and Personal Injury with offices in: Bergen County, Hackensack, Ridgewood, Mahwah, Fort Lee.

If your spouse has hurt you or threatened to hurt you, intentionally damaged your property, or repeatedly contacted you in a way that is annoying or intimidating, you may be able to get a restraining order against them. Our law firm serves many Fort Lee family law clients around these and other family law issues. A restraining order can require your spouse to do a of a number of things including: prohibit them from contacting you or others named in the order, from continuing the abusive behaviors, or from possessing a firearm. It can give you sole possession of the home you both live in, require them to pay for certain expenses, require them to undergo counseling, or other relief that you request for yourself or your children. If your spouse is being abusive, your family law attorney will help you collect the documentation you need of the abuse to get a restraining order. Your attorney can help you to decide what the order will compel your spouse to do or stop doing to keep you and your children safe. You may want to ask your attorney about pursuing criminal charges against your spouse.The highly qualified Bergen County lawyers at Aretsky & Aretsky provide experienced, caring, and aggressive representation in the areas of Divorce, Criminal Defense, Employment Law and Personal Injury with offices in: Bergen County, Hackensack, Ridgewood, Mahwah, Fort Lee.

As Bergen County employment law attorneys, we encounter all kinds of New Jersey employment concerns, from simple to unusual and complex.Here are some of common employment concerns that necessitate an attorney:1. Contact an attorney anytime you believe you were discriminated against on the basis of your race, nationality, sex, marital or domestic partnership status, age, medical condition or disability, or other protected status. Discrimination is always wrong , and an attorney will help you fight for justice and the compensation you deserve.2. You were not paid at least New Jersey minimum wage of $7.25 an hour for all the hours you worked. If you’ve been paid improperly, our employment attorneys in Bergen County can help you recover your wages.3. Workplace harrassment: No employee should ever be subjected to the hostile work environment created by sexual or other workplace harassment. Unlawful harassment can include unwelcome verbal conduct, such as racial slurs or offensive comments about the sexual orientation, religious dress, or disability of an employee. If you are a victim of unlawful harassment or discrimination, a Bergen County employment lawyer can help protect your employment rights.The highly qualified Bergen County lawyers at Aretsky & Aretsky provide experienced, caring, and aggressive representation in the areas of Divorce, Criminal Defense, Employment Law and Personal Injury with offices in: Bergen County, Hackensack, Ridgewood, Mahwah, Fort Lee.

Once they have made the difficult decision to get divorced, most people want it to be over as soon as possible. (If you are looking for a Ridgewood divorce attorney, see our website) The good news is that New Jersey does not have a waiting period for divorce, like some states do.If you have a simple case, no children, and few assets; or if you and your spouse are lucky enough to agree about most of the matters of the divorce; it could be all over in as soon as 2-3 months.For many divorcing couples, things are more complicated. While the dissolution itself doesn’t take long, things like parenting and dividing your assets can take longer to settle. Your attorney’s first priority is to make sure your interests are best represented in the final decision and that the process is fair to you, but they will also advise you on how to get it done as quickly as it can be.The highly qualified Bergen County lawyers at Aretsky & Aretsky provide experienced, caring, and aggressive representation in the areas of Divorce, Criminal Defense, Employment Law and Personal Injury with offices in: Bergen County, Hackensack, Ridgewood, Mahwah, Fort Lee.

Check out this article from The Jersey Journal about the debate over proposed law changes:Is alimony antiquated? Should child support depend on ability to pay?

“There’s a chorus of people shouting that alimony is a leftover from an earlier society and awards are arbitrary and unfair. They don’t complain as loudly about child support, but there’s a growing demand for amounts to be modified when payers hit economic hardships. Couples often wrangle over payments before, during and after their divorce, and few judges enjoy hearing their griping and sniping. In this not-so-great economy, complaints have grown even shriller and more frequent. Assemblyman Sean Kean of Monmouth County introduced legislation that already has been approved unanimously by Judiciary Committees in both houses of the Legislature. It would allow courts to modify child support and alimony payments when circumstances change. That means courts could lower payments if the paying spouse or parent lost a job or suffered some other significant decline in income lasting six months or more. Only if the income reduction wasn’t deliberate, of course….”

The highly qualified Bergen County lawyers at Aretsky & Aretsky provide experienced, caring, and aggressive representation in the areas of Divorce, Criminal Defense, Employment Law and Personal Injury with offices in: Bergen County, Hackensack, Ridgewood, Mahwah, Fort Lee.