The use of all types of social media by New Jersey divorce attorneys has increased steadily over the past several years. What you say, text, email, or post can be used against you as your divorce proceeds. On the other hand, an experienced New Jersey divorce lawyer can also use your spouse’s posts to support your allegations.

Social media postings, etc., can be used…

• to show an inconsistency regarding income and lifestyle;
• to find evidence of hidden assets;
• to find examples of inappropriate or irresponsible behavior;
• to indicate that a party lied in testimony;
• to give insight into a party’s parenting skills; and
• to provide information about other family law, divorce and child custody issues.

New Jersey is an equitable distribution state. In order for a judge to determine what constitutes a fair distribution of marital property, it is crucial that both parties provide complete and accurate information.

Information indicating that a party has been less than honest often can be found by studying that person’s social media output.

Read more: Family Law

Possible Scenario #1: A spouse has filed a motion to decrease the amount of alimony he must pay on the ground that he is having extreme financial difficulties.

His ex-wife does not think he is telling the truth. Some mutual friends have provided her with the following information, which she presents to her divorce attorney:

• her ex-husband sent out a tweet about the his beautiful new car;
• her ex’s new girlfriend posted a photo of the expensive gift he gave her; and
• a mutual Facebook friend posted a photo of her ex and his new girlfriend enjoying themselves at a luxury resort.

These and similar posts can be used by a savvy divorce lawyer to indicate that the ex-husband’s lifestyle does not match his declaration about his income.

Possible Scenario #2: A spouse testifies that she has no work skills and, therefore, it is unlikely that she will be able to find employment. The wife’s Linked In profile indicates that she is highly skilled and that she has experience that most employers would welcome.

The husband’s lawyer can use the information to contradict her testimony.

New Jersey divorce and family law attorneys can use social media as evidence to support or fight child custody requests:

• photos in which a parent appears to be drunk, especially if the child is in his or

her care;

• a tweet about what a great time a parent is having at a party at a time when he is

supposed to be having quality parenting time with his child;

• evidence that a parent is away from home a lot because of work; and
• other texts, posts, tweets, etc., that would affect child custody or parenting time.

If you suspect that your ex is intentionally turning your child against you, you should take extra care not to email, text, or post anything that could be misconstrued and used against you.

It is equally important that you do not put out negative comments about your ex that might be construed as an attempt to turn your child against your exAdultery and Cohabitation

Even though most New Jersey spouses filing for divorce choose the no-fault ground of irreconcilable differences, some choose a fault ground, such as adultery.

In a survey conducted by the American Academy of Matrimonial Attorneys, more than 80% of divorce lawyers questioned reported an increase in their use of social media as evidence of spousal infidelity.

New Jersey divorce attorneys utilize many sources to obtain their evidence:

• Facebook posts of the spouse and the new girlfriend or boyfriend;
• New girlfriend’s or boyfriend’s Instagram photos of a gift from the spouse;
• tweets about their relationship;
• emails and texts to mutual friends about their relationship;
• and so on!

New Jersey divorce lawyers similarly use all forms of social media to prove cohabitation when the couple does not have an enforceable written cohabitation agreement.

Social media posts are routinely used as evidence in divorce and family law cases. Here are some common-sense suggestions regarding social media:

Advise your attorney if there is anything about your social media footprint that can be used against you.

Let your attorney know if your ex has posted anything that might be used as evidence to support your claims and/or contradict your spouse’s claims. Examples would be items such as these:

• tweets bragging about a bonus;
• photos of your spouse in front of a new luxury car; or
• a Facebook photo of your spouse at a party instead of being with your child during parenting time.

Refrain from posting photos, sending texts, etc., about a new romantic relationship.

Do not make negative statements about your spouse, including those referring to his or her parenting skills.

In other words, don’t post anything that you will be sorry for in the near future or even years from now!

Social media can be used to support or to undermine your testimony in your divorce. Take care when using Facebook, Twitter, Linked In, Instagram, and any other form of social networking.

Your knowledgeable New Jersey divorce attorney will use the information you provide to your advantage and will do what is necessary to fight against information that your ex might attempt to use in order to discredit you.

If

If you are about to go through a divorce, consider the issues raised in the article below. Divorce arbitration and mediation are alternatives to litigating your matter in Court. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/deborah-moskovitch/the-truth-about-divorce-y_b_4629267.html The partners at Aretsky & Aretsky, Esqs., are Court approved mediators.

Eric J. Aretsky Aretsky & Aretsky 3 University Plaza Drive, Suite 207 Hackensack, NJ 07601 Phone: (201) 996-0234 Fax: 201-445-5867

A best friend can definitely help you tough out your divorce, but what do you do when your best bud isn’t available to help? You may want to check out the latest apps designed to help people through their divorces. That’s right, applications (or apps, as they are better known) definitely go beyond the latest version of the Angry Birds game. Well beyond and into the realm of helping people navigate the ins-and-outs of divorce.

App Helps With Logistics

Take the logistics of sharing custody of your children with your former spouse. Even if your divorce was amicable, issues about scheduling often arise. Communicating all the details about Junior’s violin recital and your daughter’s soccer games just got a lot easier with 2houses, an app that helps you coordinate your schedule with your ex-spouse so that both parents can know their child’s schedule at a glance without even having to pick up the phone. Well, OK, you’ll likely be using your phone to use the app so you will have to pick up the phone, but you likely won’t be using it as much to go over all the details of the weekly schedule.

Parents Can Share Stories and Photos

2 houses is more than just a calendar and scheduling, tool. The app also offers a finance feature that allows parents to jot down notes on money they’ve spent on their children, such as to pay for the dentist. The app also offers parents a messaging option to notify them if there has been a schedule change. Parents can use the journal and albums to share anecdotes, stories and photos about their children. Parenting Apart is an app, based on the book by the same name written by Christina McGee, that offers advice and guidance on wide-ranging topics dealing with divorce. This app promises to help divorced and separated parents make decisions that will help kids become “happy, confident and secure kids.” Among the topics included: what to expect during the different emotional stages for parents and children, adjustment issues for kids, talking to kids about divorce, co-parenting, and options for the legal process.

“Making Documentation Easy”

Divorce Log, has as its slogan “Making documentation easy.” This app makes it easier for you to keep track of your incoming and outgoing expenses that pertain to your divorce, such as all incoming and outgoing child support and alimony payments, time spent with your child, expenses, and correspondence. The app, which promises privacy, allows you to control who sees the information. You have the option of forwarding any of the information to whoever you wish. This app is handy to keep track of important information. If none of these apps are quite what you’re looking for, you can search the iTunes store or Google Play for other options to see other available apps better suited for your needs.

Are you thinking that a divorce will mean each spouse will get half of what you both own together? Not necessarily. The equation is a lot more complicated than simply splitting the financial assets and liabilities in half so that each spouse can get his or her half. The reality is that many things come into play that could affect your finances after a divorce. What comes into play depends a lot on how much each spouse earns or has the potential to earn, among other things. One report estimates that an individual would need 30 percent more in income after a divorce to continue the same standard of living as when he or she was married. The statistics about the potential financial ramifications of divorce are sobering. They don’t paint a pretty picture, but advance planning in consultation with your divorce attorney can help you be better prepared.

Things to consider: Here are some things that could affect your financial picture after a divorce:

• New rental or mortgage payment.
• How much is left on your mortgage if you keep your former home.
• How much your home is worth if you plan on selling it.
• Upkeep costs of maintaining property you formerly owned jointly.
• New alimony or child support payments that may not cover all expenses.
• Cost of increased childcare since you won’t be able to rely on your spouse to help care for your children.
• Transportation. Do you have a car or do you need to buy one?
• Do you have enough furnishings or will you need to buy new ones?
• Do you have health insurance or will you need to get a job that provides one?
• Can you get a job that provides health insurance?
• Do you have a good credit history? If not, this could affect everything from the kind of mortgage or rental you will be able to get to what kind of job you get.
• Have you kept up with your job skills or will you need to pay for education/training costs to update your skills in order to get a job?

The first few years following a divorce can be the toughest financially as you adjust to a new lifestyle and make adjustments for increased costs. The above is by no means a complete list. Unfortunately, one of the harshest realities following a divorce is a radically different financial situation. Are you ready for that?